Chastity Training is a fine art in the realm of Dominance and submission. The ability to control a man's primal urges for frequent sexual release poses as one of the more challenging disciplines of the Mistress and slave dynamic. A central focal point of his daily rhythm and distraction, the very thought of handing the keys of his virile vehicle over to a Mistress can be downright terrifying. The notion that a Woman should dictate the timing of his orgasms as well as when he may even have skin contact with his main member is not for the slave who merely wishes to dabble and dally. For most men, their modus operandi is the lifelong reliance upon self-gratification that often takes on the form of compulsive, less-than-satisfying, linear starts to finishes.
Nevertheless, orgasm control is a common fantasy amongst enthusiastic submissive men. Challenging as it will certainly be in the beginning stages of chastity training for both slave and key holder, the long-terms benefits of a well-behaved locked-up slave is far reaching. The initial period of penis imprisonment will be most trying for the chastised male. A newly caged male may feel intense anxiety, longing to be "freed", frustrations over this foreign blockade, and the screaming urge to remove the device as soon as possible. After merely a few hours of encasement, he will become increasingly aware of the alien appendage tucked between his thighs. This new presence will be progressively imposed upon his psyche and can manifest in different ways. Men have an almost unconscious, monkey-like habit of touching themselves (without chastity) throughout the day, many times a day. As the realization of his helplessness sets in so does despair. Although discomfort is minor, the emotional impact is extreme. He may have a change of heart and convince himself that his consensual lock-down was a mistake, crawling back to his Mistress and BEG (I love it when they beg) to be freed. Needless to say, the Mistress will not be doing him any favors by relenting.
Upon surviving the early adjustment period of chastity, the slave will begin to reap the rewards of lock-down. Every hour of endurance bolsters his commitment to serve his key holder. His submissive pride blossoms, making his Owner pleased with his growing fortitude and capitulation.
Denial of orgasm has two diametrically opposed intentions. The function of the chastity device is to prevent sexual fulfillment while simultaneously providing a potent stimulant. A constant and obsessive reminder of sexual thoughts without access to his favorite organ, chastity tortures and rejuvenates the slave with a sense of conflicting arousal that is now directly associated with his key holder. The Mistress, full of discipline and composure (an emphatic statement of Her superiority), will ensure the proper level of in-cock-ceration and timely release. A locked slave will refocus his attention from himself to that of pleasing his Mistress, ensuring that his performance meets Her standards and carefully avoiding that which would result in Her disapproval or--worse--disappointment. Chastity thus becomes an incentive for self-improvement.
Freedom from furious masturbation (quite undignified might I add) is also achieved through being caged. No longer is the male specimen obsessively preocuppied with gratifying himself throughout the day (a good slave should not be so easily distracted). His very sexual core is now being efficiently managed by his key holder who will ensure his good behavior and reward him when She deems it appropriate to do so. He will become more productive in his work, more attentive to Her needs, more balanced in general. His orgasms, when he is allowed such, will also increase in intensity after being locked for prolonged periods of denial. If the Mistress is generous She may even place him on a regular 'milking' schedule so that he is "free and clear" for all other services on Her itinerary. What was once a primitive, self-indulgent creature is now elevated to that of a disciplined slave of newfound clarity in thought and purpose.
When male chastity is well managed, the Mistress can more easily exert control over Her subject. Artful teasing and the promise or threat of orgasm denial can greatly enhance their D/s dynamic, as well as turning the most boorish and self-centered Y-primates into considerate, adoring beings. At some point the male slave willingly waives his right to have an orgasm, trusting that his Mistress will grant or withhold one with sound reason and judgment. His penis, his orgasms, his erections, his very sexual being all belong to Her and those are for Her to use, on Her terms, for the sake of Her pleasure and satisfaction. Upon deciding that She will reward him with a release, She may bring him to the point of abject desperation before allowing a merciful completion. When a Woman controls that which controls a man, the amount of power She holds is immense--and rightfully so given that Women are the gatekeepers of sex. Chastity embraces this damnable social reality by converting it into a game of winners for both parties.
Chastity training is reserved for the advanced slave not by virtue of experience but defined as those who are clearly able to separate the fantasy from the logistical confines of reality. Interested slaves who are serious or D/s couples seeking guidance are welcome to reach out to Me for questions and training.
To acquire a quality chastity device, I highly recommend reaching out to real D/s lifestyle couple, Mistress K and her slave D (who are based in the UK), by visiting their website at HouseOfDenial. Passionate about BDSM education, and just funny and wholesome kinksters in general, they will personally help you select the unit that is right for you and your willing inmate.
In closing, I have included a beautifully written testimony from Gideon, a male submissive/friend who underwent chastity training for a year at the hands of another exacting Mistress. At my behest, he offered his insight to share with my readers:
I find that the topic of male submission is often misunderstood, or taken only by the face value of pornography, or what is seen in pop culture. Chastity is a fetish that is absolutely getting more visibility in the past two decades. I attribute this to both the free availability of erotic online content, and a cultural shift that is pushing more openness about sexual behaviors that had been kept clandestine in the past. Chastity is a lot of things for a lot of people. My personal experience with it is the best insight I can provide. I spent close to a year in chastity under the supervision of a professional mistress whom I dated personally. We used a steel model based very closely on the steelworxx, ‘looker’ design. During the duration, I was allowed out solely on weekends, with full emission close to once a month on average. My then mistress aimed to use this routine for behavioral modification over time. I’m sure many who have experimented with this lifestyle are aware of many of the physical and psychological responses so unique to this experience. Your hormonal levels will change, testosterone production will increase. I experienced a heightened state of intent and awareness with every task I pursued. Until you’ve actually been in one of these things for at least a month in denial, its hard to even conceptualize. Everything, and I mean everything becomes erotic. With a mistress that pays close attention to your goals, she can use this suggestibility almost limitlessly. My mistress at the time particularly used this to emphasize goals in my work, daily life, and practice of serving her. There is a rewiring that occurs, where your constant hunt for any elusive erotic stimulation is compensated by the work and servitude that is your only outlet. It is not easy, and at times maddening, but I can say without a doubt that it expanded my understanding of my own self control. Men in our daily lives are often prisoners of our sexuality. As in control as we think ourselves, we are driven by subconscious sexual response circuits that are so deeply embedded in our daily routines that we barely notice how much we are a slave to these abstract concepts in our minds. In this, we are all slaves in our own freedom. Chastity, and power exchange lifestyles, experimentation, and play turn this paradoxically on its head. Perhaps it is through ascetic behavior, monastic devotion and discipline that a man can find true mastery over his own deeper impulses. Our culture in western society has dispensed with much of the mystic and initiatory rituals that emphasized discipline to a higher non-material devotion. In the absence of Mithras, I found a form of worship and devotion to a woman and her goals, through her to a form of divine feminine. Chastity was the blunt tool that made this experience possible, and while not for everyone, it definitely helped me tap into cognitive function and change that I am glad I was able to experience during the time I did. Also it’s tragic that most men die not knowing they have a prostate.